Help! We’re New Empty Nesters. What Now?

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So you’re brand new empty nesters. What do you do?

Sending your last adult child off to their next adventure is always a big adjustment, whether that’s college, the workforce, or marriage. Everything is quiet at home now, and it’s just you and your spouse for the first time in years. How will you adjust to life alone as a couple?

Becoming empty-nesters is exciting for many couples. For others, it seems daunting. After all, you spend the last couple of decades focused on raising kids. If you had multiple children, your house was full of life and activity. With everyone focusing on their next stage in life, it’s time to focus on yours, too.

If you’re a new empty nester, let’s talk about some ways you can focus on making the adjustment to being on your own as a married couple again.

Take Time to Process Your Emotions

Becoming an empty nester is an emotional time. Even if you’re thrilled with the change, you’ll still need time to adjust. Your life just shifted dramatically once again, so give yourselves plenty of grace as you get used to your new normal.

It’s perfectly fine to feel a wide range of emotions now that your children have all moved out of the house. If you’re feeling excited about the future, allow yourself to enjoy it. And if you’re sad or apprehensive, that’s okay too.

Talk to one another about how you’re feeling as you ease into this transition. Keeping communication open between you and your spouse will help you both feel loved and supported during this time. And if each of you is feeling different emotions about the change, be patient and understanding with one another.

Get to Know Each Other All Over Again

Now would be a fantastic time to get to know each other all over again. If you want to add that extra spark to your marriage, this is a great opportunity to do so. Having the kids out of the house means you’ve got a fresh chance to date each other, and even fall in love all over again.

Do more of the things you love together, such as shared activities. If you stopped doing those things during the child-rearing years, consider starting back. Schedule regular date nights and set aside plenty of time to be together.

Make Plans for the Future

Having an empty nest doesn’t just mean enjoying the moment; it also means making plans for your future together. There are so many possibilities for the two of you. Consider planning a trip, setting some big goals as individuals and as a couple, and focus on doing more of the things that bring you joy.

Maybe you’ve experienced challenging times in your marriage. Being empty nesters means you also have time to heal and strengthen your marriage in this new season. Our book, Strengthen Your Marriage, is a guide that helps married couples reinforce their relationship and get to know one another better than ever before. Learn more and get your copy here.

Are you an empty nester? What was the transition like, and how have you chosen to focus on your marriage? Let us know in the comments.

2 Comments

  • Michele Larsen says:

    My husband and I have been married for 24 years. We different opinions about the next step after we pass away. One of us wants to be buried in a coffin with the idea we would be buried next to each other and the other wants to be cremated to save money for our child/can be placed anywhere. And there are other reasons too for each side. Both sides have shared their thoughts, been heard, (side note no argument or raised tempers, we talk about it calmly) and both feel it is a 10 out of 10. Where do we go from here?

  • Donna Jeanne Schneider says:

    One cremated can be placed in coffin with the other one. Great u r not arguing. Look at the historical basis for cremation– Hinduism and Hitlers ovens? Anyway there are cheaper options for burial that don’t involve cremation… homeless coffins! Seriously! Much much more

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