Do We Really Need Pre-Marriage Counseling?

If you’re engaged (or planning to get engaged in the future), it’s important to make sure that pre-marriage counseling is on your radar. While pre-marriage counseling isn’t necessarily required, we don’t believe any couple should skip this important step. Going to counseling before you marry can help you get to know one another on a deeper level—and possibly prevent certain problems before they arise.

Before we go any further, yes; we highly recommend pre-marriage counseling. Now, let’s go over a few reasons why.

A Trusted Counselor Offers Objective Feedback

It’s so important to have a source of objective feedback, especially during a season as emotionally intense as engagement. Your pre-marriage counselor will offer balanced and objective advice to help you and your fiancé stay on the same page as you plan your wedding. They will also help you unpack any expectations or misgivings you may have about marriage in a safe space.

This is the time to make sure you know one another as well as possible. Your pre-marriage counselor can help to facilitate that. And, if they notice red flags or potential challenges the two of you can’t see yet, they will be able to call attention to those things. Their job is to help you gain as much clarity on your current relationship and future marriage as possible.

Pre-Marriage Counseling Can Help You Tackle Relationship Challenges Head-On

Wise guidance from a trusted and experienced pre-marriage counselor can give the two of you much-needed perspective on challenges you may be facing during the engagement period and beyond. For instance, let’s say one of your parents is urging you to wait on getting married. Your immediate reaction might be to push back and resist that advice.

Many engaged couples face pressure from their parents or extended family. At times, the family believes the couple should wait to marry. If a situation like this were to arise for you, then you would be able to ask for your counselor’s objective opinion.

Your counselor will be able to shed light on your questions and give you some insights into why (or why not) waiting to marry might be wise. You can bring questions to your counseling sessions to help you work through other possible challenges, such as dealing with controlling relatives or learning to stick together as a united front in the face of pressure.

Pre-Marriage Counseling Can Help You Save Your Marriage Before It Starts

Starting your marriage off on the right foot—by seeking wise counsel—can actually help you save it before it even begins. This is the goal of our relationship assessment and guidebook, both titled Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts (or SYMBIS). You can seek pre-marriage counseling with a SYMBIS facilitator near you. Together, you and your fiancé can work through the assessment, then review the results and insights with your counselor.

The SYMBIS Assessment can help the two of you understand one another better and on a deeper level than ever before. When you establish your marriage on a foundation that strong, you’re starting with your best foot forward. Take the assessment here; it pairs well with the book as a comprehensive guide to a better relationship.

Are you planning to attend pre-marriage counseling? After reading this article, are you considering it? Let us know in the comments.